The Sunday Times: Issue #17

There's a lot of literature out there that promises to teach you how to say 'no.' If you're a chronic people pleaser or don't have strong boundaries, you might struggle with this. I, however, struggle with saying yes. So many times in my career I've felt too much overwhelming fear, anxiety, and worry to say yes. And I've let it keep me from many exciting opportunities. Turning down an invitation feels relieving at the time ("Whew!"), but I'll never know who I could have met, where it could have led my jewelry journey, or what other exciting things may have come from accepting that invitation.

This week, I learned how it feels when you say yes even when you know you're not ready or capable (or worthy). I also learned how it feels to be a small part of something really exciting that came from nervously saying yes many years ago. I'll share with you these stories in this week's quick issue in the hopes that you might feel empowered to say yes to something that is currently scaring you.

So pour yourself a cup of tea and get comfy.

"I've never really done anything to create what has happened. It creates itself. I'm here because it happened. But I didn't do anything to make it happen apart from saying 'Yes'."

- Ringo Starr

IMPOSTER SYNDROME

WHO, ME?

At the end of 2020, my best friend Samantha asked if I was up for making her future sister-in-law, Alie Ward, an engagement ring. I had just started metalsmithing a few years earlier and hadn't yet made anything that significant for anyone, let alone for someone so well-known. I told Samantha "no" immediately. I felt way too insecure in my skills and the thought of getting it wrong was paralyzing. I told her I was too busy with other work and that I wouldn't be able to do it. Being the good friend that she is, I think she saw through my excuses and told me that I should really reconsider. After a few back-and-forths like this, she finally convinced me to do it. She handled the stone selection and the design, I just had to make it.

It ended up being one of my favorite rings I've ever made. The stone perfectly matched the color of Alie's eyes and it was flanked by heirloom diamonds. Not only did I prove to myself that I was capable, Alie ended up coming back a few months later and asking if I could bring her dream wedding ring to life. A win-win!

In the following months and years, a vast (and I mean vast) majority of my clients have come from Ologies and Alie. I know for a fact I would not be in the place I'm in with my company if it weren't for this opportunity. Then this week happened!

Alie was on The Tonight Show this week and that means my jewelry was, too! It was amazing to see her absolutely steal the show and to also catch a few glimpses of her wedding band. Huge shoutout to Darci Shea who collaborated with us on this incredible enamel replica of Jarrett's (Alie's husband) eyeball. Watch the clip here. All I kept thinking about was how grateful I was that Samantha, Jarrett, and Alie believed in me when I didn't believe in myself.

IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN YOURSELF -

SURROUND YOURSELF WITH FRIENDS WHO DO

I'm so grateful for those who push me in my life. They push me beyond what I think I'm capable of accomplishing and hush my endless "what if's." This week I began to consider what my business would look like if I started to accept wholesale opportunities. I had very long discussions with my partner Dave as I told him the many reasons why I didn't want to take that on, why it could never work, etc. He patiently listened while also asking questions that got me thinking more deeply about my knee-jerk negative reactions to responsibility and commitment. He allowed me the space to think of all the positives that it could bring instead of all the things that scare me (cough, deadlines, cough). I also have Samantha to thank again for cheering me on when considering selling my jewelry to stores instead of only selling through my own website. It's not news I can announce or share right now, but it's the beginning of me considering that I could possibly do it.

PRODUCT SPOTLIGHT

FONTANELLA PENDANT

The Fontanella ("Little Fountain" in Italian) Pendants are an ode to abundance. Styled after the famous drinking and holy water fountains seen all over Italy, they are meant to be worn as a reminder that everything you need is already within you, you just have to turn on the tap.